the empty spaces
where you sometimes used to be
must irritate you

Oh what lovely balls
I have hanging down below
I touch them nightly

The best part of this
Is that I have nothing to
Show for all my work

Oh how the wind blows
Through the winds of my backyard
It's here where I live

The best part of this
Look at my IP address
You know who I am

Brilliant spring weather
Shining over the buildings
Oh do I love me

Perhaps I should call
The school principal and
Report the vandal.

About this square land
Three colonies of squirrels
Scruffy buggers too

mornings greet warm air
spring collections arriving
bums getting the rush

Converse with God?
No! I\'m not American!
We can all do it

I know they are the
only ones who think they can
But they got that wrong.

See I told you \"God\"
I \'ll publish Criticisms
You will not stop me

He is not doing it right!
Major disasters
William is avoiding God
He

Major disasters
William is avoiding God
He

Major disasters
William is avoiding God
He

Major disasters
William is avoiding God
He

forgive my malice
i neither skydive nor joust
fragility sealed

or gulfshore cities
that lie beneath sea level
and corrupt elders

unless, of course
a people choose to reside
on volcanic isles

said earthquake victims
indeed warrant sympathy
but all is random

A shout out to all
Of our Japanese friendlies.
Just horrifying.

when a jape wears thin
the jester must to amends
homicidal, I

no, seriously
i have rendered some bad verse
but i will smoke fools

Clever reparte
but no one here gives a shite
murder shabootsi

You know what I like?
I love how the wind whispers
Your beautiful hair

the unkindest cut
fuck you slash apostrophe
defacing my work

alphabet haiku
timed correct to the letter
but it\'s just bs

b b b b b
b b b b b b b
b b b b b

pulling and tugging
so many intriguing smells,
fighting every step.

Unfit, out of shape
Lazy footwork, shanked backhands
Heckled by children

the preceding three
are the worst haiku for you
you are most welcome

milk mixed metaphors
disseminate similes
hmmm. take my life... please

spraying grafitto
on subterranean walls
none shall soon behold

hooray for mine soul
it\'s like pissing in the wind
or shadow boxing

suppose the forlon
are the lone form in repose
on saturday night

prognosis is grim
need a novel opinion
doctor in the house?

poets, sages, fools
have a surefire remedy
for thrice broken hearts?

way up in the sky
above the frieze of honor
a bird hovers free,

fountain gurgles on
laughing children splash away
a dog waits at rest,

and in the distance
bells ringing marking of time,
not an endless day.

THESE HAIKU WRITERS
THERE JUST TRYING TO FIT IN
SOCIETY SUCKS

in a world of damned
autistic programmers they\'d
put their shit on line

oh apostrophe
your format\'s an enigma
or erroneous

there\'s no answer here
we all need some therapy
if that\'s an answer

Tell me the answers
I beseech you bad haiku
I need therapy

asleep betwixt naught
hurtling toward isolation
upon a pinhead

rollling unwilling
awash in adrenaline
kite flying at night

rollling unwilling
awash in adrenaline
kite flying at night

huffing gasoline
i ransack the town square, nude
a paper bag affair

the forlorn unite
in unison abandon
unworthy suitors

a lesson descent
from vertiginous apex
i turned an ass cheek

heart rent asunder
retaliatory plot
abandoned. mercy

Tasty cashew nuts
Look like tiny fetuses
Good source of fibre