Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 57 Days and 78011 Haiku later...
Space is coming to Shat inner.

Ten bucks says he pukes.
Or Shats himself; maybe both.
Pack some clean undies.
Haiku # 72418 October 6, 2021 3:30 am ET
by a;sldkfj
Tit Suffocation
Simulate sleep apnea
warm milk at bedtime
Haiku # 72417 October 6, 2021 3:27 am ET
by Giant Tit of Everything you wanted to know
It sure does work, sir
Ahhh. The smell of fresh cut farts.
You just butt dialed me
Haiku # 72416 October 6, 2021 3:24 am ET
by Hello of Is it me (can of Febreze) you're looking for?
I need a long nap.
With a mouthful of tiddies.
And a mug of beer.
Haiku # 72415 October 6, 2021 3:23 am ET
by That's all!
Shatner's going to outer space
Haiku # 72414 October 6, 2021 3:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just like a cell phone.
Built in expiration date.
I think I've passed mine.
Haiku # 72413 October 6, 2021 3:21 am ET
by My, but my butt still works. of Flatus testimonial.
Giveth us a break
Why you beateth us uppeth
when we are downeth?.
Haiku # 72412 October 6, 2021 3:18 am ET
by God is weird of Complainteth Boxeth
God must be Chinese.
See this universe he made?
It's falling apart!
Haiku # 72411 October 6, 2021 3:16 am ET
by The 2nd Law of Thermodynamics for example. of I mean, what the hell is that?!
Call them Transformers.
They will get soooo riled up.
"Triggered" they call it.

I'll identify
as a dog so I can poop
right on the sidewalk.
Haiku # 72410 October 6, 2021 3:11 am ET
by It's Fido!!!
The Lord giveth and
The Lord taketh away, but...
More taking lately.
Haiku # 72409 October 6, 2021 3:05 am ET
by This universe is such a piece of shit. of Can we take it to the Universal WalMart customer service and get an exchange or refund?
It would be sad if
William Shatner was a girl.
... "She shat 'n her pants!"
Haiku # 72408 October 6, 2021 3:02 am ET
by How did the get that name??? of SHATner. That's messed up.
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Haiku # 72407 October 6, 2021 2:49 am ET
by Jomwins of Cambodia
play football for God
young Jesuit behemoths
mash you up real good
Haiku # 72406 October 6, 2021 1:15 am ET
by Touchdown Jesus of Notre Dame
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Haiku # 72405 October 5, 2021 11:51 pm ET
by Jomwins of Cambodia
William Shatner launch
I'm sure I'll feel right at home
shitting in my suit

One thing worries me
If my balls sag any lower
I'll trip over them

Beam me up Scotty!
I'll fuck alien hotties
wearing my potty
Haiku # 72404 October 5, 2021 10:29 pm ET
by Haute Manure of Pret a Port a Potty
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Haiku # 72403 October 5, 2021 8:54 pm ET
by Jomwins of Cambodia
Have we met before?
I've never seen Darth's penis
but I'd take a peek
Haiku # 72402 October 5, 2021 8:39 pm ET
by Sk
Some people think that
but we aren't the same poet.
I don't have a dink
Haiku # 72401 October 5, 2021 8:33 pm ET
by SK of PNW
Haiku time-travel:
I went way back and realized
Darth is Starkitten!
Haiku # 72400 October 5, 2021 7:28 pm ET
by He is Her Own Librarian
God bless AMAIRCA!
Greatest damned nation on earth,
Exporting Disney.
Haiku # 72399 October 5, 2021 7:25 pm ET
by And Transexual Insanity
Cabot white cheddar
I was raised on that stuff, dude
Extra sharp is best
Haiku # 72398 October 5, 2021 7:08 pm ET
by You have excellent taste
Okay, now I'm back.
There weren't many ants out there.
Those that were, suffered!
Haiku # 72397 October 5, 2021 5:11 pm ET
by Here the screams!
Sick of online crap.
Virtual anything's dumb.
I'll go torture ants.
Haiku # 72396 October 5, 2021 4:34 pm ET
by Where's my magnifying glass? of Because that's what God would do.
White cheddar's better.
Yellow for a dull fellow.
Buddha likes Gouda.
Haiku # 72395 October 5, 2021 4:32 pm ET
by Cheeses Rice of You ever have grits w/ cheese... it's yummy!
Are you kidding me?!
You don't believe in Jesus?!?!
What is WRONG with YOU?!?!?!!
Haiku # 72394 October 5, 2021 4:28 pm ET
by Time traveler from 1683. of Sent here by an evil witch.
There's this one sharp cheese...
Cabot! That's the name. Walmart.
That's some damn good cheese!
Haiku # 72393 October 5, 2021 4:12 pm ET
by Goes will with turkey. On whole wheat, toasted, with tomato and onion. And of course with a side of Fritos.
I'll read a book now.
Just because, you know, it's cool.
... "One fish, two fish." Nice!
Haiku # 72392 October 5, 2021 4:10 pm ET
by It reminds me of an old love affair. of With an ending that spiraled into something unexpected.
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Haiku # 72391 October 5, 2021 4:08 pm ET
by EdwardIllic of Ukraine
Have you ever put
gunpowder in an ashtray?
No smoking campaign.
Haiku # 72390 October 5, 2021 4:07 pm ET
by Extremists everywhere!
Baby bird's first flight.
Whoops! The tomcat ate him up.
Free for one minute.
Haiku # 72389 October 5, 2021 4:03 pm ET
by God Bless 'Merika!
The naked old man
Shouted and danced in the street.
People walked on by.
Haiku # 72388 October 5, 2021 4:01 pm ET
by True freedom!
Fart in someone's hair
Random act of flatulence
Fart and run like heck
Haiku # 72386 October 5, 2021 2:01 pm ET
by Noticer
Do you love cheeses?
Do you worship the flavors?
Eternal savors
Haiku # 72385 October 5, 2021 1:56 pm ET
by Vermont Cheddar of Better
Do you love Jesus?
If you give your heart to Him,
everlasting life!
Haiku # 72384 October 5, 2021 1:39 pm ET
by It keeps going and going and going... of Easter Energizer Bunny rechargeable power tools to make an easier job for carpenters like Jesus.
Here I sit,
broken hearted,
need an organ donor,
I'll try Cambodia.
Chicken hearts on skewer.
With BBQ sauce.
Don't say I have no heart.
I have many!
Haiku # 72383 October 5, 2021 1:35 pm ET
by BBQ turkey hearts would be effing awesome, I bet.
That was me, my bad.
An early Taco Tuesday.
You understand, right?

It's in your front yard
'cause I left you a present.
It's the thought that counts.

Speaking of the count,
do vampires use tampons
to keep from leaking?
Haiku # 72382 October 5, 2021 10:19 am ET
by It's October... time for monsters and creatures of the night. No, not freaking Batman. He doesn't count.
Snuffleupagus.
If he's imaginary
who made this dung pile?
Haiku # 72381 October 5, 2021 1:53 am ET
by Noticer of Big Turd
May have to check in
to the insane asylum
Fucking coyotes
Haiku # 72380 October 5, 2021 1:34 am ET
by Not a fan of Living in the woods
How many good things can happen in one day?!
Haiku # 72379 October 5, 2021 1:24 am ET
by I near pooted meself with joy!
So was George Lucas
creative or just greedy?
Let's ask Lord Vader.

The right formula.
The most cash for the least thought.
Drowned in plastic toys.

Seven billion bucks.
Not bad for a half-assed tale.
Wish I had a piece.
Haiku # 72378 October 4, 2021 11:50 pm ET
by I fought in the Clone Wars and all I got was this lousy light saber! of Retired clone commando.
All Pigeon Haiku!
pigeon pigeon pigeon (coo)
pigeon pigeon (poo)
Haiku # 72376 October 4, 2021 10:14 pm ET
by A. Pigeon of The Pigeon Cooperative
I break into song
Hello Darthness, my old friend
Nice to see you here
Haiku # 72373 October 4, 2021 5:13 pm ET
by again of Rhyming Catfunkle
Sleep paralysis
Someone check on Zuckerberg
(my first Facebook friend)

Did he unfriend me?
My obnoxious duck face pose?
All my cries for help
Haiku # 72372 October 4, 2021 5:08 pm ET
by Drinker of Kambitcha
Chickpeas and yogurt.
Washed down with kambucha tea.
Here comes the thunder!
Haiku # 72370 October 4, 2021 4:27 pm ET
by Oh those yeasty beaties. of Blast everlast.
So which is it?
Kambucha tea? Vinegar?
They taste just the same.
Haiku # 72369 October 4, 2021 4:24 pm ET
by I have the best microbiome!
Censors even here
just for mentioning the Jews
(and Jesus was one)
Haiku # 72368 October 4, 2021 4:05 pm ET
by ADL Keyword of Keychain
Separate servers.
You'd think they'd know the value.
I poo golden eggs.
Haiku # 72367 October 4, 2021 3:56 pm ET
by Goose me!
I'd poop on the run,
but my poop has a great smell.
They'd chase me faster.
Haiku # 72366 October 4, 2021 3:52 pm ET
by RosiePoo TwatWaffle
zuckerberg announced:
"facebook is shut down for good,
go to badhaiku"
Haiku # 72365 October 4, 2021 3:28 pm ET
by scotch of sell your stock!
facebook, instagram
servers are all down today
badhaiku? it's fine
Haiku # 72364 October 4, 2021 3:23 pm ET
by scotch of adjusting to the new look
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