Weighed my dick today
Didn't even register
Scale must be broken
by Contempt of Court
Who your wife thinks of:
Ralph Nader eating hot dogs
In a Ford Pinto
by No seatbelts
Learn the alphabet
One day you may wanna say
F U to someone
by Who your wife thinks of When you're in bed
Women used to douche
With toxic Lysol products
To please some douchebag
by Woman of 2019
DO NOT MESS IT UP
WARNING DO NOT MESS IT UP
DO NOT MESS IT UP
by Strict God
Today is the day
You only get this one chance
So don
by Strict God
Pink protuberance
Thrusting with exuberance
Now you messed your pants
by C of Cum on grandpa
Meanwhile in Japan
Ginsu knives chop syllables
Make Bad Limericks
by Pocky Stick of In my pants
The world is a dump
But I don't look so ugly
When I stand near you
by Noticer of Details of Near person uglier than myself
Seashell to his ear
Philippines long distance
Hollywood calling
by Posh Poet
Microfiber cloths
Clean caked on goo and smegma
Put a spit shine on
by Noticer of Details of Washroom
I've just four inches
You likely require more
So just suck it twice
by Example of Poor hygiene
Been pulling for hours
I still cannot remove this
Python from my ass
by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
There's too much filth here.
Don't give your hearts to Satan.
Praise be to Jesus!
by TTGFP " of course you know this means war." -- Bugs Bunny
Spasm spasm spasm spasm spasm
Then wait seven syllables
Then start convulsing
by Grand Mal of French Poetry
What's DF watching
As he drools on his keyboard...
Is it sports or spurts?
by Howard Cosell Clean-up Committee
She swallowed your pride
Reclaim your manhood tonight
Watch sports on tv
by Ghost of Howard Cosell of Sofa
I came too early
As most guys do at one time
At least she swallowed
by End of A long day
Sir Darth Figpucker
Found NOT GUILTY by reason
Of profanity
by Here cums of The Judge
Heads move from side to side
They're following the action
Can you grunt like me?
by Monica Seles of Spectator Spurts
Sucking one's own dick
Should be a spectator sport
I know that I'd watch
by Not guilty by reason of Temporary insanity
I got syphilis
Followed by gonorrhea
And then died of AIDS
by Night of The Living Dead
Riding my skateboard
I'm so inspirational
Riding my skateboard
by Beto O'Rourke of Metallica concert
The only good thing
I have to say about France
Cats walk on tables
by Starkitten of Tables
Paris: flaming dame--
Payback for the massacres
Of the Huguenots
by St. Barthelemy of 1572
Farted,but no shit
Sneezed my head off, no booger
I got a hard on
by My Day
Is it possible?
Simultaneously sneeze
And blow your load, too?
by Getterdun
On this doll right here
Show us where Daddy touched you
A Figpucker Doll!
by What a Women want of Lining up
When things get boring
Dress your penis in doll clothes
Ventrilojizzum
by Throwing my Voice
Dirty underwear
New Jelly Belly flavour
Ronald Reagan's farts
by Win one for the quiffer
I saw you in church
Fishnet stockings, stilettos
Get a grip, Father!
by Holy Mackerel, Andy of The cow kicked Nancy
That pained expression
Mask of exasperation
As you take a shit
by Your face of You wear it well
Pissed off Italians
Not unlike cassowaries
Whatsamattayou??
by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
Fire! Must Act Quickly!
Trump suggests golden showers
To extinguish fire
by Noticer of Details of France
Roman relic burns
Do I give a Notre Dame?
It's just a building.
by Holy Bone of the Virgins Adam's Apple
What started that fire?
Priest getting fucked up the ass
Flaming broom handle
by Noticer of Details of Notre Dame
Throw down some haiku
The Lord forgives all your sins
Say some dirty words
by Cunt Scribe
My time here is short.
I fear the monster's return.
It is what you want.
by TTGFP of Lord have mercy on these sinful poets!
Praise be to the Lord!
My only friend in this world
Darth Figpucker
by Starkitten of Glitter pan
Been chasing dollars.
For the church collection plate.
Praise be to Jesus!
by TTGFP of No, seriously! I mean it!
Figpucker is gone
His dirty thoughts and prayers
Our consolation
by Poet
Believe me, I try
Holding back the haiku flow
That time of the month
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of cunt
Genital bonsai
Mutilation or high art
On the cutting edge
by That foolish moustache tickles
No other art form
Brings the artist such pleasure
As masturbation
by Self portrait
Turning Japanese
Left my shoes parked at the door
Dick origami
by Spitting Crane
A lonely pursuit
Arrangement of syllables
Might as well beat off
by Punk of Chewation
CB Radios
Mom standing in the kitchen
What a cameltoe
by Noticer of Details of Beside myself
I thought they were pets
Rabbits down in the cellar
They were for dinner
by Just a kid
Pissed off Italian
The chain link fence broom attack
Yard vigilante
by Rural Guido of Backyard
Heads bowed in prayer
Fresh Halibut Homily
Homely as a cunt
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
