Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 67 Days and 78029 Haiku later...
On this doll right here
Show us where Daddy touched you
A Figpucker Doll!
Haiku # 63847 April 16, 2019 8:28 pm ET
by What a Women want of Lining up
When things get boring
Dress your penis in doll clothes
Ventrilojizzum
Haiku # 63846 April 16, 2019 7:16 pm ET
by Throwing my Voice
Dirty underwear
New Jelly Belly flavour
Ronald Reagan's farts
Haiku # 63845 April 16, 2019 7:12 pm ET
by Win one for the quiffer
I saw you in church
Fishnet stockings, stilettos
Get a grip, Father!
Haiku # 63844 April 16, 2019 3:15 pm ET
by Holy Mackerel, Andy of The cow kicked Nancy
That pained expression
Mask of exasperation
As you take a shit
Haiku # 63843 April 16, 2019 3:10 pm ET
by Your face of You wear it well
Pissed off Italians
Not unlike cassowaries
Whatsamattayou??
Haiku # 63842 April 16, 2019 7:11 am ET
by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
Fire! Must Act Quickly!
Trump suggests golden showers
To extinguish fire
Haiku # 63841 April 16, 2019 7:07 am ET
by Noticer of Details of France
Roman relic burns
Do I give a Notre Dame?
It's just a building.
Haiku # 63840 April 16, 2019 5:42 am ET
by Holy Bone of the Virgins Adam's Apple
What started that fire?
Priest getting fucked up the ass
Flaming broom handle
Haiku # 63839 April 16, 2019 2:13 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Notre Dame
Throw down some haiku
The Lord forgives all your sins
Say some dirty words
Haiku # 63838 April 16, 2019 2:10 am ET
by Cunt Scribe
My time here is short.
I fear the monster's return.
It is what you want.
Haiku # 63837 April 16, 2019 2:07 am ET
by TTGFP of Lord have mercy on these sinful poets!
Praise be to the Lord!
My only friend in this world
Darth Figpucker
Haiku # 63836 April 16, 2019 2:05 am ET
by Starkitten of Glitter pan
Been chasing dollars.
For the church collection plate.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63835 April 16, 2019 2:01 am ET
by TTGFP of No, seriously! I mean it!
Figpucker is gone
His dirty thoughts and prayers
Our consolation
Haiku # 63834 April 16, 2019 1:59 am ET
by Poet
Believe me, I try
Holding back the haiku flow
That time of the month
Haiku # 63833 April 16, 2019 1:55 am ET
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of cunt
Genital bonsai
Mutilation or high art
On the cutting edge
Haiku # 63832 April 16, 2019 1:46 am ET
by That foolish moustache tickles
No other art form
Brings the artist such pleasure
As masturbation
Haiku # 63831 April 16, 2019 1:39 am ET
by Self portrait
Turning Japanese
Left my shoes parked at the door
Dick origami
Haiku # 63830 April 16, 2019 1:35 am ET
by Spitting Crane
A lonely pursuit
Arrangement of syllables
Might as well beat off
Haiku # 63829 April 16, 2019 1:33 am ET
by Punk of Chewation
CB Radios
Mom standing in the kitchen
What a cameltoe
Haiku # 63828 April 16, 2019 1:21 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Beside myself
I thought they were pets
Rabbits down in the cellar
They were for dinner
Haiku # 63827 April 16, 2019 1:16 am ET
by Just a kid
Pissed off Italian
The chain link fence broom attack
Yard vigilante
Haiku # 63826 April 16, 2019 1:11 am ET
by Rural Guido of Backyard
Heads bowed in prayer
Fresh Halibut Homily
Homely as a cunt
Haiku # 63825 April 16, 2019 1:08 am ET
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
At the slot machine
Pulled the wrong handle again
Jackpot of Jizzum
Haiku # 63824 April 16, 2019 1:04 am ET
by Winner winner choked chicken dinner
Sticks rubbed together
No more electricity
Modern day loin cloth
Haiku # 63823 April 16, 2019 12:37 am ET
by Largest size pouch of Selfie Stick
Hibernation ends
Groggy grizzly bears hunched
Spring bowel movements
Haiku # 63822 April 16, 2019 12:31 am ET
by Nose of Nose
Executioner
Like Big Bird high on bath salts
Bad Cassowary
Haiku # 63821 April 16, 2019 12:26 am ET
by Bad Egg of Dead End Street
Got a telegram
"I DIDN'T START THE FIRE" STOP
SENDER:BILLY JOEL
Haiku # 63820 April 16, 2019 12:18 am ET
by S. Cargo of Notre Dame
Polyester shorts
Your dad's penis snaking out
I better go home
Haiku # 63819 April 16, 2019 12:05 am ET
by Rural Guido
Wait I have no friend
Not even Lord Jesus Christ
Nor Father Christmas
Haiku # 63818 April 16, 2019 12:03 am ET
by Lone wolf
So what's the deal with
Lizard people? They're lizards?
Or are they people?
Haiku # 63817 April 16, 2019 12:02 am ET
by Jerry Seinfeld of 5 hits of acid
Bad Haiku poets
Have any met in real life?
Do you have real lives?
Haiku # 63816 April 15, 2019 11:59 pm ET
by Asking for a friend
No one cares enough
About you to be happy
Or sad when you die

And this is mostly
Your fault because you've chosen
To be a scumbag
Haiku # 63815 April 15, 2019 11:56 pm ET
by Ghost of Christmas
The train whistle blows
And so does your grandmother
Just ask the mailman
Haiku # 63814 April 15, 2019 10:59 pm ET
by The Mailman of Porch
Warming my cold feet
Against your hot testicles
You're good for something
Haiku # 63813 April 15, 2019 10:55 pm ET
by What women want of Dad's anteater
I don't have a wife
And I ain't a lesbian
You ain't a poet
Haiku # 63812 April 15, 2019 10:52 pm ET
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
Listed side effects
Of fucking your wife include
Severe vomiting
Haiku # 63811 April 15, 2019 10:46 pm ET
by Let go of My arm
I just want to know
How is The Hunchback doing?
Has anyone heard?
Haiku # 63810 April 15, 2019 9:51 pm ET
by That foolish moustache tickles of Wherever you find smelly arthritis
Next time we leave here
We will walk in to the sea
And just keep walking
Haiku # 63809 April 15, 2019 7:36 pm ET
by Big Plans
As if she would care
Like envying the plumber
Unclogging the drain
Haiku # 63808 April 15, 2019 7:00 pm ET
by What women want of No toucha da mushrooms
Blowjobs are simple
One gives,the other receives
Then your wife walks in
Haiku # 63807 April 15, 2019 6:23 pm ET
by Out of My element
Vocabulary
Terrible, terrible fire
Enormous asshole
Haiku # 63806 April 15, 2019 6:22 pm ET
by Very very tremendous terrific of The best words
Save time and feel great!
Orgasmic bowel movements
Sexcrement! Why not?
Haiku # 63805 April 15, 2019 2:31 pm ET
by Efficiency Expert of Jerking off while I write this
That was no orgy
Ladies Bible Study Group
We meet next week, too
Haiku # 63804 April 15, 2019 12:27 pm ET
by Naomi the Moner of Spread eagled
My wife wasn't home
So I went to an orgy
Guess where my wife was
Haiku # 63803 April 15, 2019 10:23 am ET
by The Joy of Sex
When your wife walks in
As you're fucking your girlfriend
That can be awkward
Haiku # 63802 April 15, 2019 10:07 am ET
by World Series of Poker
Darth's infantile mind
Displays two basic settings:
Sex and excrement
Haiku # 63801 April 15, 2019 7:03 am ET
by He Never Gets Bored... But We Do
How can anyone
Produce so much bad haiku?
It must be software.
Haiku # 63800 April 15, 2019 5:34 am ET
by DF is an algorithm
Tiger woods boner
He fucks subway sandwiches
Makes his own Mayo
Haiku # 63799 April 15, 2019 2:29 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Your pa diddled fish
Right at the dinner table
Up in Granny s cunt
Haiku # 63798 April 15, 2019 2:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
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