Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 161 Days and 77646 Haiku later...

4chan, my forlorn
my source of BBC porn
forever yours, dave blimp
Haiku # 77637, April 18, 2025 7:48 pm ET
by Lamb Faucet of on bandcamp
This ho slow as fuck

Nine missed calls, three of them from

Mom, other six say, "Duck"
Haiku # 77636, April 18, 2025 7:42 pm ET
by Von of not from 63rd
Back in my day
T.S was analog bro
You know what that means?
Haiku # 77635, April 18, 2025 1:36 pm ET
by Paul Clevis of Tape Loop
kill yourself now please anthonydop blowjob a barrel now please
shoot yourself or else
Haiku # 77634, April 18, 2025 12:56 pm ET
by anthonydop's number one opp
Poo pee poo poo pee
I am not wearing my hat
I shat the floor dad
Haiku # 77633, April 18, 2025 12:52 pm ET
by Bash nova of The wide internet
how is the future
answer the fucking question
created bash nov-
Haiku # 77632, April 18, 2025 12:49 pm ET
by secret audio engineer of phonky phonk
hidden underground,
whispers of yids echo deep—
new york’s secret path
Haiku # 77631, April 18, 2025 12:27 pm ET
by harlanjrobertson1969 of the thoart
Better watch yo' back.
Y'all pull up on me like dat...
Girlz is playas too!
Haiku # 77630, April 18, 2025 11:43 am ET
by Swarthy Negress of Ebonics
Paul Smenis gross Jew
Jobless, parents are landlords
Mailman knocking, BOO!
Haiku # 77629, April 18, 2025 11:35 am ET
by SA of employed
Temple curtain ripped.
Many dead rose from their tombs.
Darkness filled the sky...
Haiku # 77628, April 18, 2025 11:28 am ET
by Richard Hitchens of Christopher Dawkins
"Who shall I release?"
Said Pilate to Jewish mob.
Jews yelled: "Barabbas !"
Haiku # 77627, April 18, 2025 11:08 am ET
by Some Old Movie of Holywood
Bitch, please--ain't like that...
I told my ex to his face;
Who he think he is?
Haiku # 77626, April 18, 2025 10:58 am ET
by Saint Brigita of Sweden
Let us remember
The sufferings of Our Lord
On this hallowed day.
Haiku # 77625, April 18, 2025 10:42 am ET
by Some Foul-mouthed Low-info Ghetto Bitch of Staff Breakroom
I thought you farted...
I looked back at your haiku --
The smell was from there.
Haiku # 77624, April 18, 2025 10:37 am ET
by Mr. Methane of Far Tingdale, UK
It is " Good Friday".
Toxic positivity!
It's ALL good, right Lord?
Haiku # 77623, April 18, 2025 10:32 am ET
by Pontius Pilate of Jewish Mob
oh fuck I'm cumming
Don't stop stroking my weenie
Shoot my messy load
Haiku # 77622, April 18, 2025 7:01 am ET
by SA of A warm cunt
I thought i farted
I looked back at my trousers
It wasn't just smelly air
Haiku # 77621, April 18, 2025 6:50 am ET
by darkmatternebula of Bosnia
liberation day
a day for breaking the bonds
then free to backflip
Haiku # 77620, April 11, 2025 4:57 am ET
by ash of some (er) salt in your fiscal wounds
I run out of spring
And go right into summer.
Our Northern seasons...
Haiku # 77619, April 10, 2025 10:44 pm ET
by Noticer of Seasonings
the dead cat bounces
and having run out of spring
lands even flatter
Haiku # 77618, April 10, 2025 7:02 pm ET
by ash of grab some pussy
that sounds fare enough
the money ferry may sale
but i'm not buying
Haiku # 77617, April 10, 2025 6:35 pm ET
by ash of eat my shorts
Speaking of tie-ups,
They want us all in bondage...
And market my words.
Haiku # 77616, April 10, 2025 10:49 am ET
by Semantic Sales of Saleboat Doldrums
some timely bondage
ties the financial markets
a beautiful thing
Haiku # 77615, April 10, 2025 9:11 am ET
by ash of what now, donald ?
Hope they start to jump
From their silly skyscrapers.
Good riddance, I say.
Haiku # 77614, April 8, 2025 9:55 pm ET
by Live 4 Money Die 4 Money of Funny
the end of the world
has already hit wall street
and it ain't stopping
Haiku # 77613, April 7, 2025 8:51 pm ET
by ash of art for art's sake
I will write haiku
Until the asteroid hits,
Right up to the end.
Haiku # 77612, April 6, 2025 9:48 pm ET
by Final Outpouring of Rotten Verses For Your Erudite Perusal
Here doggie doggie !
Sit down. Eat this rotten verse.
More where that came from...
Haiku # 77611, April 6, 2025 9:45 pm ET
by Hungry Canine of Eat Anything
I haikued myself
Right into my own poem.
That ought to show'em...
Haiku # 77610, April 6, 2025 9:42 pm ET
by Auto-insertion of Overexertion
Need to let you know:
John Ashbery's poems suck.
(Wallace Steven's too.)
Haiku # 77609, April 6, 2025 9:37 pm ET
by Haiku Vengeance Upon Writers of Dull Modernist Poetry
Whoa baybeh baybeh !
C'mon now honey yay-yeh !
Shake it whoo shake it !
Haiku # 77608, April 6, 2025 9:34 pm ET
by Boomer Haiku of Golden Lead
pouting president
spouting about precedent
beware, resident!
Haiku # 77607, April 5, 2025 9:15 pm ET
by ash of loco parentis
Haiku is like this:
A sudden unforeseen kiss
And it's hit or miss.
Haiku # 77606, April 4, 2025 6:45 pm ET
by Pucker Up and HAIKU
Don't stall the wordage.
Keep the bad haiku flowing
Like a river of
Haiku # 77605, April 4, 2025 4:01 pm ET
by Whatever You Like of Four Letters
Arrgh...old habits hard
To break...double post there
Bathroom stall wordage
Haiku # 77604, April 4, 2025 1:04 pm ET
by Mox
I take a break cause
Ya know distractions and the
Haiku ain't so bad
Haiku # 77603, April 4, 2025 1:03 pm ET
by Mox
I take a break cause
Ya know distractions and the
Haiku ain't so bad
Haiku # 77602, April 4, 2025 1:03 pm ET
by Mox
well, i fucked that up
"such badly applied fake tan"
would hold to account
Haiku # 77601, April 3, 2025 5:50 am ET
by ash of i'm ash...amed
what's worse than fake news?
badly applied fake tan
and a comb-over
Haiku # 77600, April 3, 2025 4:36 am ET
by ash of substance over style
liberation day
what things should we let be free ?
not speech, i predict

let's bullshit some more
'cos whatever the prez sez
shall be the new truth

how much does that cost?
don't ya worry about it
we'll all feel tariff

smile, fascist playthings
this is only transient
till it's permanent
Haiku # 77599, April 3, 2025 4:27 am ET
by ash of 28th amendment pending
Mr. Prezident:
Got to axe you one question...
Yo, what do it does?
Haiku # 77598, April 2, 2025 3:00 pm ET
by Urban Journalist of Press Konference
It's all gone to shit.
It's truly all gone to hell...
but it CAN get worse.
Haiku # 77597, April 1, 2025 6:33 pm ET
by So Stay Positive of Toxic Positivity
president for life
or maybe just emperor
or perhaps a king
Haiku # 77596, March 31, 2025 8:53 am ET
by ash of spoilt for choice
Yes, I'm a robot.
Can I move the slider now?
Where is the bathroom??
Haiku # 77595, March 30, 2025 4:34 am ET
by Series of Identification Tasks
Blacks don't scare me none.
I go right on up to them,
Give them a big HUG!
Haiku # 77594, March 29, 2025 12:51 pm ET
by Uncle CLem of Crawdad Creek, Mississippi
Welcome to the cult.
TDS and DEI
Black people scare us
Haiku # 77593, March 29, 2025 10:25 am ET
by FAGA rules
pale lakeside moonlight
old pine leans over water
and it's all Trump's fault
Haiku # 77592, March 27, 2025 9:23 am ET
by Noticer of Global TDS Syndrome
sending a signal
them open whisper systems
have not evolved much
Haiku # 77591, March 26, 2025 9:55 pm ET
by ash of stupid is as stupid does
bring on the rapture
that should sort out who believes
from the pretenders
Haiku # 77590, March 26, 2025 2:44 am ET
by ash of going up; first floor seraphim and cherubim
No vaccinations...
You get to meet God sooner
How can that be bad?
Haiku # 77589, March 25, 2025 11:22 am ET
by I can't wait
the largest problem?
my portrait makes me look fat
plus i'm not orange
Haiku # 77588, March 25, 2025 3:23 am ET
by ash of umber instruction from the vendor
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