Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 70 Days and 78034 Haiku later...
Why do you haiku?
Something to do While you poo?
You know it is true
Haiku # 75099 March 9, 2022 9:43 am ET
by Gildon Bert
High ku, lo ku-ku
Waikiki or why haiku
Haiku you, we high.
Haiku # 75098 March 8, 2022 10:12 pm ET
by Don Gilbert of Internet
I'm "devastated"
And I am "heartbroken" too.
(The George Soros show).
Haiku # 75095 March 8, 2022 8:56 am ET
by Strictly Re-runs of Hungary
Best Birdseed Breakfast
West of the Rocky Mountains
Stick that in your beak
Haiku # 75094 March 8, 2022 7:19 am ET
by Tip of my beak
A bowel movement
consisting of syllables
is headed your way
Haiku # 75093 March 8, 2022 5:48 am ET
by Glory of Morning
Russia has the bomb
Vladimir wants to use it
Paranoid nut job
Haiku # 75092 March 7, 2022 10:52 pm ET
by He's so short, hung like gerbil
Russia is the BOMB.
Vladimir is our savior!
He is superman.
Haiku # 75091 March 7, 2022 5:33 pm ET
by And Mr. P is Super-sexy too
Russia sucks dog balls
Talk about third world shit holes
Corrupted leader
Haiku # 75090 March 7, 2022 10:07 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Imprint of a boot
All of that moon shit was fake
We were playing space.
Haiku # 75088 March 7, 2022 1:18 am ET
by Noticer of Dusty Footprint improperly cooked N.Y. Strip steak( Encino)
Wail hay thar. Hit's me,
Yer ole knuckle-draggin frind...
So LET's GO BRANDON !
Haiku # 75087 March 6, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Klaus Schwab of Old Smoky Mountains
Free crackpipe sandwich!
Poupon your roast beast! Slathered!
Fifty shards of Darth!
Haiku # 75086 March 6, 2022 7:03 pm ET
by Calling my Lawyer of Immediately
That's packing a lunch!
Fifty shades of Grey Poupon.
Slathered on Roast Beast.
Haiku # 75085 March 6, 2022 5:55 pm ET
by Luncheon of Holiday Inn , Encino, California
I prefer sandwich
Stuffed full of tasty goodness
Like your mom's buttocks
Haiku # 75084 March 6, 2022 5:45 pm ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
The free crack pipe lie?
Shut up and kiss Mike Lindell
And drop your pants
Haiku # 75082 March 6, 2022 9:59 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yes, Agrohimnee.
I will bring device to Kiev.
You have timer codes?
Haiku # 75081 March 5, 2022 8:25 am ET
by Marilyn Ninna of Humanitarian Non-profit Troll Farm
Stop your squawking, friend.
It's time for Birdie num nums.
It's time to party
Haiku # 75078 March 4, 2022 9:08 pm ET
by Noticer of num nums
Biden: free crack pipes.
Russia: invade the Ukraine.
C.I.A: "We win!"
Haiku # 75077 March 4, 2022 12:03 pm ET
by Chants of "Let's Go BRANDON !"
Put in your two cents
You will receive one haiku
and two freeze dried farts
Haiku # 75075 March 3, 2022 11:42 pm ET
by Deal of The Day
Put in then put out.
Put up or shut up. Haiku:
What we want from you.
Haiku # 75073 March 3, 2022 8:25 pm ET
by Volodimir of Vladimir
if you're feeling red
and you want your neighbours dead
putin on the blitz
Haiku # 75072 March 3, 2022 6:20 am ET
by ash of get back in the ussr
The moon is old cheese
From the moon, the cheese tides swell
Blame Darth for the smell
Haiku # 75069 March 2, 2022 2:30 am ET
by Songs of The Fig Pluckers
Faint tinkling of tune...
You will piss like a monsoon
The ladies will swoon
Haiku # 75068 March 2, 2022 12:30 am ET
by Noticer of Biology
You in the cocoon
Dangling all aglow with moon
When do you bust out?
Haiku # 75067 March 1, 2022 10:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
I crane, you crane, we
all crane for Ukraine. Put in
a bit more effort.
Haiku # 75066 March 1, 2022 7:10 am ET
by Kenneth Affok of Россия
The Beak of the Week
Do any birds have big dinks?
Flightless ones, perhaps
Haiku # 75065 March 1, 2022 1:21 am ET
by 65th 75th ex of Manmoth, New Jersey
The world will be gone
before the chrysalis pops.
Better to be dead.
Haiku # 75064 February 28, 2022 2:07 am ET
by SLOTHMAN
I awoke once more
With that music heart feeling
Mind orchestra plays
Back Where I Belong
By Baroness (post chorus)
As I think of her
Spacetime's been weaving
An emotion tapestry
And I realize
Stunned hyperventilating:
This is my cocoon
Grown over new wings
That now grow, fill with my blood
Soon... I seek the moon
Haiku # 75063 February 28, 2022 12:00 am ET
by MANMOTH of Hanging upside down from a little branch, throbbing slightly but hopefully not enough to attract predators
Uncomfortably numb
He said that it was put in
I didn't feel it
Haiku # 75060 February 26, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by Melania Trump of USA
I am too boring
To putin any effort.
So I invade you.
Haiku # 75059 February 26, 2022 2:30 pm ET
by Noticer of Vladimir's Mother
Enlighten yourself
Put in some effort for once
You are so boring
Haiku # 75058 February 26, 2022 1:28 pm ET
by Bye bye
Got better lies, you?
Have you transcended their lies?
So enlighten me.
Haiku # 75057 February 26, 2022 11:46 am ET
by Your Disciple of Lies
Lies are all you have
So desperate, you believe
So they give you more
Haiku # 75056 February 26, 2022 9:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Biden's son got rich
On Ukraine energy board.
Crack cocaine. Hookers.
Haiku # 75055 February 25, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Take Administrators Seriously of HA HA HAHA HA HAHA
Corporate data:
Technocratic death-in-life.
Just say "NO" to beast.
Haiku # 75054 February 25, 2022 1:38 pm ET
by Revelation of Global Techno-tyranny
Corporate pastel:
Those flat clip-art office scenes...
Data-driven death.
Haiku # 75053 February 24, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by Noticer of Mass Death
Look, up in the sky!
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Someone noticing.
Haiku # 75049 February 23, 2022 1:46 pm ET
by Quack
The tide brings garbage.
From the moon the tides arise.
So we blame the moon.
Haiku # 75048 February 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by .
Frogs singing loudly.
Vibrations open gateways.
A good place to be.
Haiku # 75047 February 23, 2022 6:15 am ET
by .
There is no TP.
But do not worry, Beavis;
Just use the bidet.
Haiku # 75046 February 23, 2022 5:20 am ET
by Dish sprayer. of Clean enough to eat off of.
Cat poop's better than
Toblerone or Tootsie Rolls.
That's what's in my head.
Haiku # 75045 February 23, 2022 5:14 am ET
by Star Wars pinata.
I notice that you
assume more than you notice.
Look to other side.

With all your power,
please destroy the evil one.
And don't dis Jesus.
Haiku # 75044 February 23, 2022 4:58 am ET
by Just don't
Back to bowel movements:
Darth returns to his first love.
And we are impressed.
Haiku # 75043 February 22, 2022 11:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Excremental Health Facility
The first Tootsie Roll
wasn't shaped like Toblerone
More like cat feces
Haiku # 75042 February 22, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Worshipper of Cats
King Tut's last BM
wrapped up in toilet paper
A yummy mummie
Haiku # 75041 February 22, 2022 8:19 pm ET
by King Tuutsie of Mens Room (Pyramid)
made it to the end
and asked Jesus what he liked
"old, tired tart carts"
Haiku # 75040 February 22, 2022 7:30 pm ET
by the other apostle of he never did much
Delegitimize!
Reify ontologies!
Decentralize truth!
Haiku # 75039 February 22, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Noticer of Hermeneutic Implosion
Hey y’all I’m back now
Hotel room 117
I’m so freaking bored
Haiku # 75038 February 22, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by I’m also FREAKING OUT of Cyan
Goodbye bad haiku!
We had some good and bad times
I will miss this world
Haiku # 75037 February 22, 2022 11:43 am ET
by Cyan <3 of Here
Marxism doesn't care.
It will use you. Chew you up
And then spit you out.
Haiku # 75036 February 22, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Noticer of Dialectical Materialism
Bots cannot repent.
Jesus did not die for bots.
You are not a bot.
Haiku # 75035 February 22, 2022 9:27 am ET
by Noticer of Bots