Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 66 Days and 78029 Haiku later...
Inside Gram-gram's cane
was 10 grams of pure cocaine!
Nursing home party!

You will overdose
cane broken off in your ass
We tried to warn you
Haiku # 64691 May 9, 2019 1:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
What do you call an Eskimo hooker?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
A Frostitute!
Haiku # 64690 May 9, 2019 1:47 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Casso-fucking-wary!
Murdering fucking giant.
It ain't Big Bird.

Stuffitupyourass
Extinct pachyderm proboscis
8 foot cocaine line

Snuffitupyournose
You elephant's prostitute!
Snuffpornawfulbust
Haiku # 64689 May 9, 2019 1:46 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Mangina fajita burrito.
Mojito Dorito fluoresce vomitus.
Launch pad testicle rope tie.

Soggy old taco.
Distended rectum him whore roids.
Like a baboon's cunt.
Haiku # 64688 May 9, 2019 1:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Have you ever jacked off to the Numa Numa guy on YouTube?
Well then you haven't lived!
Haiku # 64687 May 9, 2019 1:35 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
money drugs pussy
overdose twat snot corpse fuck
cocaine cunt smuggler
Haiku # 64686 May 9, 2019 1:34 am ET
by crass ass gas
FARRRTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haiku # 64685 May 9, 2019 1:31 am ET
by Cum shit ladyboy bitch cassowary
Cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary cassowary
Haiku # 64683 May 9, 2019 1:27 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
This is your fantasy:
https://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/goosh-goosh/81394416/

Go jack off to it.
Write a haiku about it.
Bloody mangina.
Haiku # 64682 May 9, 2019 1:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Filled out my time card
Umpteen hours of poetry
Rich Cassowary
Haiku # 64680 May 8, 2019 11:25 pm ET
by Cassowary bird of Golden Eggs
I opened the book
Saw lots of dirty pictures
Then I jerked off

It was a long read
Thanks for letting me borrow
Your Holy Bible
Haiku # 64679 May 8, 2019 8:50 pm ET
by Avid reader
Your small genitals
Under investigation
Check is in the mail
Haiku # 64678 May 8, 2019 7:44 pm ET
by God of Sent u a refund cause I gave u tiny junk
Be on the lookout
For a crybaby poet
With a short penis
Haiku # 64677 May 8, 2019 5:46 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of His feet are small, too
DARTH all over here.
The truth is, well, you're boring.
(And predictable)
Haiku # 64676 May 8, 2019 3:22 pm ET
by Master oF arts
Playing with myself
In my rig at the truck stop
The oversized load
Haiku # 64675 May 8, 2019 1:54 pm ET
by Mack of Truck Stop
Humiliation
You have your meat hanging out
But no one wants it
Haiku # 64674 May 8, 2019 1:50 pm ET
by Smelly fart
How Jesus got AIDS
Is a mystery to me
Was it drugs or sex?
Haiku # 64673 May 8, 2019 8:17 am ET
by Memoirs of A geisha
I am watching you
But you don t think I see you
Look into my eyes
Haiku # 64672 May 8, 2019 7:24 am ET
by You will
I am watching you
But you don
Haiku # 64671 May 8, 2019 7:23 am ET
by You
Who was that one freak?
Roamed the world eating strange stuff.
Made a TV show.
Haiku # 64670 May 8, 2019 3:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Snake semen latte.
They drink that in India.
Mixed with sweet chai tea.

Commune with Shiva.
Puts a wiggle in your hips.
The spirits of snakes.
Haiku # 64669 May 8, 2019 3:19 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
The ejaculate
Brought forth from ten thousand snakes
I smirk as you gag
Haiku # 64668 May 8, 2019 2:36 am ET
by Lavatory Laureate of Lavatory
Do you drink weird bier?
No, I much prefer wierd beir.
That's what's in my stien.
Haiku # 64667 May 8, 2019 2:24 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Wearing a t-shirt
that says "Stay Weird" upside down
does not make you weird.
Haiku # 64666 May 8, 2019 2:19 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Bodily functions
do not make for good topics
of fine poetry.
Haiku # 64665 May 8, 2019 1:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Middle-aged women
should probably not dye their
hair bright pink and blue.
Haiku # 64664 May 8, 2019 1:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I wish you had AIDS
so I could anticipate
your suffering death.
Haiku # 64663 May 8, 2019 1:38 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Excuse me, monkeys.
Did you see my banana?
I know it was here.
Haiku # 64662 May 8, 2019 1:36 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
It all boils down to
Penis of a certain length
Turns red like lobster
Haiku # 64661 May 7, 2019 6:39 pm ET
by Snapper
Alcoholic fool
Plenty more where that came from
Be sure not to drive
Haiku # 64660 May 7, 2019 6:37 pm ET
by Smarten up
Haiku are so gay.
Just one small haiku equals
a hundred sucked cocks.
Haiku # 64659 May 7, 2019 5:47 pm ET
by oops!
Update to really bad Haiku

it is 5 p m
a blue planet revolving
gin and tonic bliss
Haiku # 64658 May 7, 2019 4:09 pm ET
by SacScratcher of Milky Way Galaxy
it is five p m
somewhere on this blue planet
gin and tonic is born
Haiku # 64657 May 7, 2019 4:02 pm ET
by SacScratcher of Milky Way Galaxy
I wish I had AIDS
So I could kill somebody
Just by fucking them
Haiku # 64656 May 7, 2019 1:43 pm ET
by Gulity of 1st degree murder
Haiku is like gold:
it is totally worthless
except for the shine.
Haiku # 64655 May 7, 2019 12:26 pm ET
by Goldy Himmelfarb
When playing in other people's poop
you've made a better choice
than writing haiku.
Haiku # 64654 May 7, 2019 6:48 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
When playing in other people's poop
it is important to forget
that they might have strange diseases.
Haiku # 64653 May 7, 2019 6:46 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
The bible was wrong
Mary wasn't a virgin
She was fucked plenty
Haiku # 64652 May 7, 2019 4:39 am ET
by Going out of Business sale
Chief Diarrhea
His bravery remembered
He walked the Brown Trail
Haiku # 64651 May 7, 2019 2:51 am ET
by Fecal Historians Society
Jesus must be happy to be slandered
by a petulant scumbag who has
the charisma of a rodent gloating
about the poison it's eating
I've met rats with better personalities
which says a lot because rats eat their own shit and you might too but at least rats don't brag about it
Haiku # 64650 May 7, 2019 2:11 am ET
by Anonymous Prophet
When playing in your own poop
It is important to remember
You are the only one covered in poop
Haiku # 64649 May 7, 2019 1:17 am ET
by Advice for Retarded Satanist
Somersault Handstand
Jumping Jack Jumping Jack split
Wank. Ejaculate
Haiku # 64648 May 6, 2019 7:24 pm ET
by Darthrobics of Fitness Gymnasium
Tsunami of filth
syllabic, dull, moronic:
lyric mind of Darth
Haiku # 64647 May 6, 2019 6:06 pm ET
by Haiku Antiseptic Spray of Poetic Hygiene Vigilante Squad
Inconsolable
Sehnsucht identified now
It's Cedric; Mark him
Haiku # 64646 May 6, 2019 4:44 pm ET
by Ledge of Kentucky
Jesus is hairless
He keeps a flavor savor
On his chin sometimes
Haiku # 64645 May 6, 2019 3:39 pm ET
by Tuna
Jesus has a beard
To cover the cum splotches
Gotten through the years
Haiku # 64644 May 6, 2019 2:43 pm ET
by Failure of The mental health system
I'm in the next stall
I'm shitting like a racehorse
I'm scratched from the race
Haiku # 64643 May 6, 2019 12:00 pm ET
by All bets are off
It is what it is
Radioactivity
Leaking from my ass
Haiku # 64642 May 6, 2019 11:51 am ET
by It is what it is
Bad. It's BAD BAD BAD.
That is what this Haiku is.
All because of you.
Haiku # 64641 May 6, 2019 10:37 am ET
by Excavated Tombs of Haiku
Watch me lift this car
Dead lifting an Elephant
Proof of my manhood
Haiku # 64640 May 6, 2019 1:48 am ET
by Man with microscopic penis of In my sports car
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