This is not profound.
But then what did you expect?
Nothing ever is.
by
When I am nervous
I tend to write more poems
That makes me nervous
by Nervous Rex
The masseuse was blind
Naturally, I asked how come
Too much beating off
by Anonymous Poet
Massage in bunghole
Message In bottle said FREE
Came HUGE deposit
by Story of Happy Ending
Message in bunghole
by Anonymous Poet
Adrift on the sea
Lonely brown chunk. Fecal debris.
by Castaway of SOS to the World
Chinese Factory
We finishing more your junk
Keep wanting more junk
by Chinese Factory Worker of Chinese Factory
Sometimes I miss them
My biggest best smelliest farts
Then I write poems
by Poet of Poetry Robot was here
No fault of my own
Exceptionally stinky
I enjoy farting
by Farting personality
Poem enema
Administered rectally
Where poems grow
by There you have it of There
The nervous rectums
Everybody must get stoned
Gnomes are still legal
by 2legit2quit
You might save some trees
But we have to spray Febreeze
Your sewage stinx, please...
by Say it don't spray it
Someone come over
Rebuke these haiku demons
Bring a fly strip STAT
by Beezle Bop of Top of dung heap Big #2
High pitched insect noise
Your poop spoke through parasites
Are you the Devil?
by Fly Gal of From the Block
Cats pay at diners
In Newtown, Connecticut
Life is beautiful
by Nun with size HUGE shoes of And a big ding a ling too
They brought you 3 gifts
A long handled wiping stick
Febreeze and a dwarf
by Use dwarf like suppository
I was raped by God.
My poop spoke in parables.
So I flushed it down.
by df of I didn't get any three gifts.
I suck garden gnomes.
It's not like I enjoy it.
It's for the protein.
by df of anything for a free hot meal
The Great Figpucker:
Guru, Swami and Poet.
Hail, Rectal Dweller!
by How many figs would a figpucker puck of Pucking Figs in the Septic Tank
Throw me in the drink
Shoot me out of a cannon
Electric chair, please!
by Get it over with of Here and Now
Someone dropped a plate
Spaghetti was everywhere
Someone even cried
by C. Wood Syndrome of Free Commubity Dinner 1976
I will outshine you
My immaculate hinder
Toilet Paper! Wipe!
by Tootsie Free of Bending Over
Plastic flamingo
Beeline for your tiny dink
Fresh shrimp Bubba Gump
by World gone Mad
The old garden gnome
Says he gonna blow his load
All up in your face
by Manager of Kmart Garden Centre
Spraying takes less time.
Wiping takes time and paper.
Spray to save the earth!
by df -- anal environmetalist
The head on my cock
goes up and down
up and down
up and down.
The head on my cock
goes up and down
all through your mom.
by df
Too busy for this
He says as he sprays his bum
No time for poems
by Life and times of Darth Figpucker of At large
One day you will know
The secret to happiness
Is picking your nose
by Nose Poker of Booger Wall
Climbing Mount Everest
Is an inconvenient time
To need to go poop
by Poopstain of Halfway there. Living on a prayer
When I call His name
He appears, almost like magic
DARTH FIGPUCKER!!
by Test of Test
Sex offender list
An upstanding citizen
Well, his penis is
by Jesus will wash away his sinz
Beatniks down in Hell
I lll be wearing my beret
And turtleneck shirt
by Prez Darth Figpucker Fan Club of On the list
Beatniks down in Hell
I
by Prez Darth Figpucker Fan Club of On the list
Fantasyland
Cunnilingus delivered
By a Giant Tongue
by Will I. Knock? of Or Ding Dong Doorbells
The cleanest anus
People came from miles away
To admire the shine
by Shiny Heiny of Blindingly Bright Light
How can God judge us?
Any qualifications?
Dude has no street cred
by You know I of In your bunghole
When I get to Hell
I will read my poetry
to torture sinners.
God told me Himself.
And for all eternity
I make souls vomit.
by df
God: "Sure, what the hell.
We need someone to laugh at."
Angels shake their heads.
by df
Cuntfart before God.
I imitated Darth's shit.
Come on, let me in.
by pooterificus unanimous
"Darth stands before God."
Bends over and shows asshole.
Jumps off cloud with smile.
by df
"Vesuvius Brown":
sounds like a mid-seventies
Blaxploitation film.
by Superfly of Shaft
Vesuvius Brown
In the morning when I rise
Sunrise offering
by Vesuvius Brown of Shitter
Have joy little Darth.
You will spend eternity
With the God of shit.
by Fecal Omnipresence of the Underworld
Darth stands before God:
"I wrote about snot and shit--
Come on. Let me in..."
by Bored by Biology of Infantile Denial
At the urinal
take out your black Sharpie pen.
Draw a three-inch square.
And under it write:
"Booger Farm!" Add a booger.
Watch them multiply.
In only one week
there will be dozens of them.
Green, hairy, bloody.
All types of boogers.
A dried snot sanctuary.
You will be amazed.
by Remember, it started with ony one. Delusions of Grandure -- playing Booger God.
Go ask yo momma.
Mosquitoes ain't all I swat.
Rosy red butt cheeks.
by Smack-orama!
A young inventor,
Ann Funt, invented a cart.
It was the Funt Cart.
by It ran on hot air.
Next time you go poop
Put up a picture of it
On your Facebook page
by Damien stein
At the salad bar
Onions, tomatoes, lettuce
Croutons, my booger
by Health Nut of Salad Bar
I enjoy farting
In claustrophobic settings
Such as this poem
by Stinky Syllables
