Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 76 Days and 78048 Haiku later...
well the chinese said
may we live in interesting
times, here we are
Haiku # 55816 December 24, 2016 2:41 pm ET
by vhs
cheeto hitler ???

:P
Haiku # 55815 December 24, 2016 2:41 pm ET
by vhs
Donald Trump with nukes.
It's time to thin out the herd.
Go Fuhrer Cheeto!
Haiku # 55814 December 24, 2016 12:20 pm ET
by df
holy shit batman
someone cleaned up the website
janis, we love you
Haiku # 55813 December 24, 2016 5:46 am ET
by ash
I'd like to get stoned.
My evil wife would be pissed.
She is such a bitch.
Haiku # 55812 December 23, 2016 2:22 pm ET
by DF
I know Jesus well.
He lives down the street from me.
But not much longer.

The Cheeto Hitler
will send him back home to Hell.
I mean Mexico.
Haiku # 55811 December 23, 2016 2:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Merry Christmas from
Jesus Claus Santa Christ; He
forgives your candy.
Haiku # 55810 December 23, 2016 2:16 pm ET
by df
no, the martains got
santa claus, voldor almost
killed him but he won.

(reference Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, terrible movie, no taboo sex, not Cannibal Holocaust or anything like that but it is a cute movie)
Haiku # 55809 December 23, 2016 11:40 am ET
by vhs
Jesus stole the sleigh.
He pawned the toys to buy drugs.
What a great New Years!
Haiku # 55808 December 23, 2016 7:12 am ET
by df
While sleeping I fear.
A thousand tasks are undone.
And so is my sleep.

And then I awake.
Holy shit, it's Christmas break!
I think I'll get baked.

God, I miss egg nog.
How is that shit even made?
I need to find out.
Haiku # 55807 December 23, 2016 7:08 am ET
by df
Spam haiku hidden.
It gives me an erection.
But my wife does not.
Haiku # 55806 December 23, 2016 6:54 am ET
by df
Jesus will return.
I don't think He'll have a choice.
Santa Claus is dead.
Haiku # 55805 December 23, 2016 6:48 am ET
by df
well everyone is
sounding like the grinch stole xmas
but dr seuss like in

style. he fought WWII
and of course was Theo
Drieser. green eggs but

NO Green Spam thank you
Haiku # 55804 December 22, 2016 12:08 pm ET
by Place Cafe/(aka vhs) of somewhere in belfast maine
cool analyzing about the topic http://www.findauthoritypill.net/viagra-generic.html
Haiku # 55803 December 22, 2016 9:08 am ET
by vigi
Sexy equations
spread sides to multiply.
Spew result with pen.
Haiku # 55802 December 22, 2016 3:57 am ET
by
I've not slept for days.
My thoughts are blurred together.
Frogs in a blender.
Haiku # 55801 December 22, 2016 3:47 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Janis is moping.
The Janitor is mopping
This haiku? Stopping.
Haiku # 55800 December 22, 2016 12:51 am ET
by Adorable Kittens
Woah, it must be you.
A bunch of spam posts are gone!
Hey, how's it going?

Janis, why don't you
Haikus sent with tags?
Would stop all the spam.
Haiku # 55799 December 21, 2016 6:45 pm ET
by Vigilante Janitor of The Internet
I'm here in person
Moping around this corner
Of the good 'ol web
Haiku # 55798 December 21, 2016 4:20 pm ET
by Janis
seasons also of
the body wearing down and
realizng older age
Haiku # 55797 December 21, 2016 3:34 pm ET
by vhs
Could anyone get
Hold of Janis recently?
Reply to email?
Haiku # 55796 December 21, 2016 2:59 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
20 years of tags.
The internet was a diff
-erent place back then.
Haiku # 55795 December 21, 2016 2:52 pm ET
by Janis
Seasons of abuse.
Now Bad Haiku hardens to
block HTML.
Haiku # 55794 December 21, 2016 2:45 pm ET
by Adam
Reincarnation.
I want to be a monkey.
All they do is fuck.
Haiku # 55791 December 21, 2016 7:32 am ET
by df
One whole semester
of calculus 1 homework
finished in 2 days.

How much did I charge?
Four-hundred twenty-five bucks.
I'm now exhausted.

I may be a whore,
but I'm the best whore there is.
The Arabs love me.
Haiku # 55790 December 21, 2016 6:36 am ET
by df
Spam is disgusting.
I'm talking about the "meat".
If you call it that.
Haiku # 55789 December 21, 2016 6:31 am ET
by df
Frog legs are tasty.
It's good that they are ugly.
Else they'd be extinct.
Haiku # 55788 December 21, 2016 6:27 am ET
by df
Addicted to Death.
We have no other option.
This is God's design.
Haiku # 55787 December 21, 2016 5:05 am ET
by Darth Figpucker, Inc. of Trump Tower Restaraunt. I'm not impressed. Hibachi Grill buffet has better food.
Capture of culture
Endless evolving effort
Roller coaster ride
Haiku # 55786 December 21, 2016 12:56 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Stars hide behind clouds.
As if playing peek-a-boo.
I hate them.
Haiku # 55784 December 20, 2016 6:11 am ET
by Unanimous Poet
I don't love my wife.
I should watch some creepy porn.
Then let her find it.

Or fart in public.
Or maybe hit on her friends.
She needs to hate me.
Haiku # 55780 December 19, 2016 6:35 pm ET
by
there was just no way
to know how far we'd come, now
except to look back
Haiku # 55779 December 19, 2016 2:54 pm ET
by Sango Orangutango of infinite jest
This web-borne assault
On our haiku garden space
Enrages me so

Time for us to move
More signal to noise ratio
Can't stop the signal
Haiku # 55778 December 19, 2016 2:38 pm ET
by Sango Orangutango of a time long ago
Love becomes vacant.
Lust becomes Armageddon.
Instead, go surfing.
Haiku # 55773 December 18, 2016 8:48 pm ET
by
Original Spam,
Turning inedible meat
into white-trash lunch.

There's more Spam here than
a Philippino breakfast.
I'd rather eat dog.
Haiku # 55772 December 18, 2016 8:00 pm ET
by df
Gen-X-fiance.
Gen-X-perienced drinker.
Gin-X and tonic.
Haiku # 55770 December 18, 2016 1:46 pm ET
by Do you miss MS-DOS? Mom called it "Miss do's". As opposed to "Miss Don'ts"
Gen-X Files.
Gen-X-rated website star.
Gen-X-ray vision.
Haiku # 55769 December 18, 2016 1:42 pm ET
by That goth kid up 'til 5 am drinking coffee at IHOP.
then there the black eyed
kids phenom in the world so
when the hell did life

become the x-files
or some damn Call of Cthulhu
game story arc?
Haiku # 55768 December 18, 2016 12:09 pm ET
by vhs
i have seen strange things
in the evangelical world
and i think it's nuts

even if i believe
the eurythmics did say
dont mess with a...pause

missionary man
hey hey...i know not haiku
but sort of you know
Haiku # 55767 December 18, 2016 12:08 pm ET
by vhs
RFID chips
and tracking our lives just makes
me sick to myself

I know right wing up
the ass stuff but hmm, i like
the ReCap here hmm
Haiku # 55766 December 18, 2016 12:06 pm ET
by Place Cafe/(aka vhs) of Place Cafe
coffee's last mile, and
here i am trying to come
up with profound stuff

when today's children
go, mom what does rewind mean
but ducktails is back :)
Haiku # 55765 December 18, 2016 12:05 pm ET
by vhs of David Tennant is Scrooge Mc/The Doctor
Momma always said,
"Coffee is AS coffee does."
I think I get it.
Haiku # 55764 December 18, 2016 3:24 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Momma always said,
"Coffee is coffee does."
But what does it MEAN?!
Haiku # 55763 December 18, 2016 3:23 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Bob pees sitting down.
There is nothing wrong with that.
He does not have legs.
Haiku # 55762 December 18, 2016 2:15 am ET
by me
so who forgot old
gen x and i gave my friend
a def leppard disk

it is hip to say
history lives, we are tre
irrelevant and

resistance is kind
of dumb if we must resist
resistance and of

course, irony do
not forget irony k
we are all xers now
Haiku # 55761 December 17, 2016 1:02 pm ET
by vhs
We were number one
But now something bad happened
And now we rank last
Haiku # 55760 December 17, 2016 7:46 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Roses are red
Violets are blue
This is a poem
Not a haiku
Haiku # 55759 December 17, 2016 7:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Memes live in memesvile
And memes are as dank as memes
And memes are REAL dank
Haiku # 55758 December 17, 2016 7:38 am ET
by Memer of Lazytown
You have pinkie toes.
Do you appreciate them?
They have a tough job.
Haiku # 55755 December 16, 2016 1:19 am ET
by Anatomy Academy


Endless toss and turn,
Over a whole day awake,
Cry insomnia.
Haiku # 55750 December 15, 2016 3:57 pm ET
by Vigilante Janitor of The Internet