Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 77 Days and 78050 Haiku later...
despite STDs
i'd fuck WJC
'til the cow comes home
Haiku # 53933 June 20, 2016 10:31 pm ET
by Lush of Hilary's ShitList
please make my breath stink
as "hail to the chief" plays on
then analingus
Haiku # 53932 June 20, 2016 10:27 pm ET
by Lush of The Oval Orifice
Some men fuck chickens.
Thus they're called chicken fuckers.
Yet they don't approve.
Haiku # 53931 June 18, 2016 7:33 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
I should not write this.
But, of course, you know I will.
See, now it is done.
Haiku # 53929 June 17, 2016 8:35 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
What an honor!
Presidential scrotal sweat!
Please bang my wife next.
Haiku # 53928 June 17, 2016 3:49 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
My balls are stinky.
I wiped them on her pillow.
Will her husband know?
Haiku # 53927 June 17, 2016 2:22 am ET
by President Bill Clinton
A car is a wheeled, self-propelled motor vehicle used for transporting and a product of the automotive industry.
Haiku # 53926 June 17, 2016 1:13 am ET
by Benz Patent of NY
Awesome page you want someone, may also employ one, end up long term additional memory in life. I Love SUVs
Haiku # 53925 June 17, 2016 12:59 am ET
by SUVs Lover of https://plus.google.com/u/0/116015602465613220713/posts
I have to save cash.
So this means no prostitutes.
Mom, please send money.
Haiku # 53924 June 16, 2016 11:08 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
oh it all started
with the arpanet and the
end of history

which is, history
Haiku # 53920 June 16, 2016 12:25 pm ET
by vhs
Do not be ashamed.
The internet is for porn.
The muppets know this.

Google image search:
Hillary Clinton's fat ass.
I am so turned on.
Haiku # 53919 June 15, 2016 11:12 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Flatulent old toad.
Bloated with methane swamp gas.
He farts from both ends.

Haiku # 53918 June 15, 2016 5:59 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
My zipper opens,
revealing more about me
than I would care to.
Haiku # 53917 June 15, 2016 5:45 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
the browser opens
revealing more about me
than the internet
Haiku # 53916 June 15, 2016 8:03 am ET
by ash
Flatulence reverb
whilst in the surfing line-up.
Those in ear-shot laugh.

The thump is deeper.
Fiberglass amplifies bass.
The sharks stay away.
Haiku # 53914 June 15, 2016 1:41 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Hello!
Haiku # 53912 June 14, 2016 5:52 pm ET
by otwptyey of USA
He sells pricey coffee.
Yuppies love when he says "cheers".
It's not wrong to hate.
Haiku # 53911 June 14, 2016 12:05 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
and if or but these
days fear rules the waves and eats
the electorate
Haiku # 53909 June 14, 2016 8:50 am ET
by vhs
so it goes he said
but he saw dresden burn and
wondered why he lived...
Haiku # 53907 June 13, 2016 12:16 pm ET
by vhs
Vonnegut is dead
His words are all that remains
"So it goes" they say
Haiku # 53904 June 12, 2016 1:17 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
A butterfly shat
on the imported taco
of Donald Trump's wife.

She washed it right down
with cheap generic vodka
and belched quite loudly.

Her boyfriend stopped by
and they had sex all night long
while Donald just snored.
Haiku # 53903 June 11, 2016 11:00 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
I recall stealing
Playboys from the Get-N-Go
when I was a lad.

Many a fond wank
was to be had in those days.
Now, goat porn dot com.
Haiku # 53901 June 11, 2016 4:39 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker.
They want their ipads.
We wanted our MTV.
What was before that?
Haiku # 53900 June 11, 2016 11:53 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Lays potato chips.
Monster trucks and drag racing.
Weaponized herpes.
Haiku # 53899 June 10, 2016 3:44 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Going for a beer.
I'll write a dirty haiku,
just for the waitress.

I'll keep you posted.
Jut please do not tell my wife.
She would be angry.

She hates me enough.
Lets not give her more reason.
On the other hand...

Who gives a rats ass.
Damned if I do or do not.
That waitress is hot!
Haiku # 53898 June 10, 2016 4:17 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
The dog licked himself.
And he was rather content.
Could you say the same?

Haiku Subtlety
is pointless on this website
so I'll spell it out.

So you can feel good,
If you need an audience,
the dog has you beat.

Go write some haiku
and flush them down the toilet.
That is your homework.
Haiku # 53897 June 10, 2016 4:13 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
The greatest boxer
was not Ali, but Jim Jones.
One punch killed hundreds.
Haiku # 53895 June 9, 2016 11:55 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
i wonder if the
spam ads count as part of the
art of this website
Haiku # 53894 June 9, 2016 11:54 am ET
by vhs
Jane Goodall is mean.
She taught Chimps to use dildos.
And then sign "I came".
Haiku # 53893 June 9, 2016 11:50 am ET
by darth figpucker
I must appreciate the way you have expressed your feelingsthrough your blog!. Click here to play.
vertix.io | dog games | fighting games | mickey mouse games | Subway Surfers
Haiku # 53892 June 7, 2016 10:58 pm ET
by vertix.io of ha noi
have a drink for me
i spent too much money on
a used car repair
Haiku # 53891 June 7, 2016 2:36 pm ET
by vhs
I did my own thing.
Better than her doing it.
My thing is happy.
Haiku # 53890 June 7, 2016 8:12 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
final syllable
in last abomination
should've read as "stench"
Haiku # 53889 June 6, 2016 8:30 pm ET
by Lush of Steno Pool
filthy signature
calligraphic turd emblem
witnesseth the smell
Haiku # 53888 June 6, 2016 8:25 pm ET
by Lush
coprophilia
brown love dare not speak its name
reduced to signing


Haiku # 53887 June 6, 2016 8:22 pm ET
by Lush
the upstream feces
an ineluctable force
woe is the downstream
Haiku # 53886 June 6, 2016 8:20 pm ET
by Lush
falling overboard
nude with a turtlin' dookie
ahoy down below
Haiku # 53885 June 6, 2016 8:19 pm ET
by Lush
do i go along with
the joke and respond or do
i do my own thing??????
Haiku # 53884 June 6, 2016 11:57 am ET
by vhs
My wife is too fat.
I don't want to fuck her now.
What am I to do?
Haiku # 53883 June 6, 2016 6:03 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
i had a poem
on my mind but now it slips
what i was to say
Haiku # 53882 June 5, 2016 3:36 pm ET
by vhs
Rio De Janeiro
Filthy rotten trash cesspool
Lets go for a swim
Haiku # 53881 June 5, 2016 12:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
pour some sugar on
def leppard waits to hear the
sarcasm fly out
Haiku # 53879 June 3, 2016 12:29 pm ET
by vhs
Coffee enima.
Do you take cream and sugar?
That one lump or two?
Haiku # 53878 June 1, 2016 3:17 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
i drink coffee and
i drink more coffee and then
write stuff about it
Haiku # 53877 June 1, 2016 12:49 pm ET
by vhs of well it said 'bad haiku' this is pretty bad
There is a spider
I opened up my asshole
It crawled right inside
Haiku # 53876 May 31, 2016 11:19 am ET
by filthy-nard
I don't have any eyes
Accidentally ate glass
Now I have no tongue
Haiku # 53875 May 31, 2016 11:18 am ET
by filthy-nard of MY SKIIIIINNNN
I'd lose a finger
to lose the ring that's attached
and free my penis.

That's spontaneous.
I don't know where that came from.
Or maybe I do.

Priorities suck.
Sacrifices FOR children.
Not like Abraham.
Haiku # 53874 May 30, 2016 6:15 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Except for one ring,
I am completely naked
reading about poop.

Pooping in buckets.
So, like, where else would one poop
if not in a bucket?

Since you're getting old,
put it on your bucket list.
Call it a shit list.

I'm glad I'm naked
in an electric fan breeze
blowing on my balls.
Haiku # 53873 May 30, 2016 6:09 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
how the hell can one
take a health clinic serious
if there's "mayo" in

the name of the place
fat on sandwiches reducing
chance at ill health?
Haiku # 53872 May 30, 2016 12:26 pm ET
by vhs
well also there's these new
channels on tv, viceland
people poop in buckets

skating, rebel gen
x crap for millenials
and of course, skating
Haiku # 53871 May 30, 2016 12:17 pm ET
by vhs